More than 1 in 5 Americans are caregivers, assisting others (usually family members) with activities of daily living and medical tasks.1 Many of these individuals are also employed and take on both roles – caregiver and worker. Read each role below to find out about supportive roles you can play to assist caregivers, and for those who are caregivers, tips to help with the many roles you play every day.
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Personal Red Phone2
What it Takes
Being the person your caregiving coworker can call whenever they're in the “red zone” (i.e., feeling maximum stress).
- To make sure they feel heard, give them your undivided attention.
- Remind them it's OK to ask for help or take advantage of available resources.
- Reassure them that they can call you anytime, and especially when they are really stressed. Just knowing that they could if they needed to can make a big difference.
Why it Matters
Research shows that knowing someone is in your corner decreases the risk of depression by 40%, and of anxiety by 30%.3
Backup Buddy
What it Takes
Stepping up when a caregiving coworker is running low on energy.
- Remind them you're always ready to help out when needed.
- Look for signs that they're exhausted.
- Offer to take your coworker's place for a while – for example, take their family member to an appointment or just sit with the family member – so your coworker can tend to themselves for a few moments.
Why it Matters
Twenty-five percent of unpaid caregivers are feeling more stress trying to balance work and family due to COVID-19.4
Eighty-five percent of “sandwich” caregivers (caring for their children and aging parents) have had at least one mental health symptom.5
Personal Shopper
What it Takes
Grabbing some groceries or a few household items so your caregiving coworker can handle other tasks – or simply take a break.
- Let them know you're headed to buy groceries for yourself. Ask if you can pick up a few things for them. Be sure to jot down nutritional needs and preferences.
- Visiting in person may cause unintended stress, so consider using delivery services instead of bringing the groceries yourself.
- Having a meal delivered from their favorite restaurant will also put a smile on their face.
Why it Matters
With 3 out of 4 employee-caregivers experiencing at least one mental health symptom (depression, anxiety, suicidal thoughts, etc.),6 even small things – like having you do the grocery shopping – can make a big difference.
Work Ally
What it Takes
Sitting down with your caregiving coworker to think through the week ahead and/or just talk about whatever's on their mind.
- They may be struggling to maintain job performance. Being able to discuss the situation with a supportive peer and/or manager can be very helpful.
- Invite them to pop their calendar open. Talk about the week ahead. Prioritize. Collaborate. Delegate. If possible, find an opportunity to attend a meeting on their behalf in order to create a bit of open space in their hectic day.
- When discussing tactical issues, be open to broader conversations that may surface about what's really on their mind.
Why it Matters
A striking percentage of unpaid caregivers report having passive or active suicidal thoughts. This shows how intense the pressures of playing multiple roles can have on their mental and physical health. Having someone to confide in can make life feel more manageable for them.5
Caregiver stress is higher in the pandemic
Almost 3x the number of caregivers have been experiencing “high intensity” during the pandemic than before it hit, according to a recent study from ARCHANGELS – a national movement recognizing and honoring caregivers.3 Ninety-one percent of High Intensity Caregivers, as defined by ARCHANGELS’ caregiver intensity index, experienced at least one mental or behavioral health symptom during the pandemic (depression, anxiety, suicidal thoughts, etc.).6 Other research of theirs, published by the CDC, showed that caregivers who had someone to rely on for support had lower odds of experiencing mental health concerns.5
Personal Driver
What it Takes
Getting loved ones to their appointments, and anywhere else they need to go, safely and on time. And doing it with love.
What Can Help
- Transportation is one of the most common caregiver tasks.7 Try to remember this the next time you're stuck in traffic while handling driving duties.
- When you need to, ask for time off from work so you can give this role (and your regular work) the focus they deserve.
- Try to work a little fun into your driving routine. For example, every time you drive your loved one to an appointment, make a quick stop for coffee or ice cream. A study indicates that rituals can help improve performance by decreasing anxiety.8
Cheerleader
What it Takes
Making an effort to find (and share) good energy – even when you're running on fumes.
What Can Help
- Deep refreshing sleep is one of the caregiver's best friends. Make sure you get the rest you need.
- Get in the habit of taking time to decompress before shifting into caregiver mode, even if it's 30 seconds to stop, close your eyes and breathe. “Micro-breaks” like this have major benefits.
- If you need something more focused than a micro-break – or it would help to have someone to talk to – look into virtual resources that may be available. Telehealth, online therapy programs and digital mental health tools, such as stress and resilience apps, are very effective at helping nurture your mental health.
IT Support
What it Takes
Helping loved ones keep up with technology so they can stay connected to things they need and enjoy.
What Can Help
- Show them how to bookmark frequently used websites – and encourage them to make a habit of it – so they can find those sites on their own.
- Enlist a computer-savvy friend or relative to provide technology support to your loved ones.
Advocate
What it Takes
Quite simply, being there – physically, mentally and emotionally – for the people who need you. Being there to help them navigate their health care, and to advocate for them when it comes to the care they receive.
What Can Help
- Just because you're the bedrock in their lives doesn't mean you have to play that role by yourself. Seek to enlist experts, advocates and peers to help you create networks of support around the people you care for.
- Familiarize yourself with helpful caregiver resources available through ARCHANGELS, the Family Caregiver Alliance, the National Alliance for Caregiving and others.
- Challenges are bound to arise. But when they do, see them as an opportunity to learn how to better navigate care or support your loved one the next time. Remember to go easy on yourself.
Let us be part of your support network.
If you are an unpaid caregiver, we know you’re strong and resilient, but you’re not a machine. You need to be cared for, too. We want to help – through the resources we offer and by making sure you know that we are always here to support you.
Blue Cross and Blue Shield of North Carolina does not discriminate on the basis of race, color, national origin, sex, age or disability in its health programs and activities. Learn more about our non-discrimination policy and no-cost services available to you.
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